"The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Even when you make a tax form out on the level, you don't know when it's through if you are a crook or a martyr."

"The best doctor in the world is the veterinarian. He can't ask his patients what is the matter-he's got to just know."

"If studidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?"

"You know everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects."

"If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging."

"Noah must have taken into the Ark two taxes, one male and one female. And did they multiply bountifully! Next to guinea pigs, taxes must have been the most prolific animals."

"We can't all be heroes because somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as they go by."

"Nurture your mind with great thoughts; to believe in the heroic makes heroes."

"Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story."

"America's present need is not heroics, but healing; not nostrums but normalcy; not revolution, but restoration."

"I think of a hero as someone who understands the degree of responsibility that comes with his freedom."

"Our heroes are people and people are flawed. Don't let that taint the thing you love."